Anyone who knows me, knows that I am a HUGE supporter of breast feeding! (Have an issue? Yo I'll solve it.) Breast feeding, for me, was one of the most miraculous and rewarding experiences ever! I sustained Jose's health, gave him antibodies and created a bond with him so tight, I'm still feeling the residual effects... "Residual effects?" you may ask? Yes! About 6 weeks ago, a lump was found (I didn't find it and ill let y'all infer as to who did 😊). I froze and became petrified. It was so overwhelmingly scary that I refused to think about it for three weeks. Re-FUSED! I know you're wondering why I would do such a horrible thing when I know (by simply being a woman) how important it is to get it checked out. It's simple...my family has a HORRIBLE line of breast cancer. All lines are maternal. From what I can gather from my mother, I have a great aunt who found it at 60 (she did a radical mastectomy when it was still unheard of! Man my family can lead the way...that's another post...) my Aunt Ester died from it at 52. It wasn't a simple death, as the tumor grew so large, it ruptured. For that to happen, she had lived with it for a very long time. My Tia Maria had issues in her left, and today had to have her right biopsied. There are other types of cancer as well (both of my sisters have precancerous cells that need to be removed before they become cancerous and a cousin who has been battling brain cancer since one. That's 31 years to date). All of them are scary...breast is inherited, hereditary...a part of the family tree and therefore more likely to occur. My brain first ran into extreme scare mode: cut them off! Especially after Angelina did it. I applaud her, as her body and breasts took a backseat to being around for her children. Once again, a mommy sacrificing herself for her children. So, I told Jeff that if it's a real lump, they're coming off and he'll have to appreciate the benefits of saline. Then I went from that extreme, to the other: pretending. So for three weeks I pretended (and quite successfully) that it and my family's horrible history with bresat cancer didn't exist. Finally, Jeff asked me about it again and encouraged me to get it checked out. I looked at him, the boys being power rangers, toys everywhere, the dog laying on a pile of cars (that HAS to be uncomfortable), the cat trying to be a Russian assassin (yet another post), and said ok. I made the appointment, took the day off of work (as mid afternoon was the earliest) and showed up to my appoint 2 hours early. I was so nervous I decided to be there instead of calming my nerves at the nearest Target. I would feel better at Target, but then I would arrive at my appointment and my bank account would've taken a Target hit for nothing. Luckily, someone cancelled, they bumped me up and I got in within 10 minutes of getting there. The doctor told me that he thinks its a result of having mastitis. For those that haven't had it: women, beat one (or both) of your boobs until you want to rip it from your body with your own two hands; men, take two swift, firm kicks to the scrotum. That may touch mastitis, and then add on that the only way to fix it is to breast feed and the baby knows there's something wrong with it, so he won't. With that said, is breast feed again at the drop of a hat, because it truly is that amazing of an experience. So leftover infection (as antibiotics are a no-no when feeding) or scar tissue made sense. Jeff had that idea to begin with, but I was skeptical as he doesn't have boobs. (Note to self: Jeff is ALWAYS right.) So the doctor scheduled me for an ultrasound and mammogram. That was today. I'm OK! Apparently I have some really dense (more than normal) breast tissue in one particular spot. It tends to swell, and I have a feeling of letting down whenever I have a hormone surge. This is typical for most women (ask them how their boobs feel the week before their cycle...sore!) and I seem to be having extra hormones. It's from having to be sensitive to Jose due to his food allergies. In other words, breast feeding made a bond so special, my body is still producing those hormones so that I'm on the alert for him. Amazing huh? I think it's kind of cool that my body is reacting to his body's reaction. So it's not residual mastitis, but in a way close enough. They did find calcium deposits, but the doctor said 99.992% of women (yes, that was her number) have them. Mine are nice and round with no blurry edges. But due to my family history, she wants me to have an ultrasound/mammogram every 6 months for two years to make sure they stay just deposits. The it's a mammogram every year until I die. I'm good with that! Lessons learned: A) it's ok to be scared and to take a LITTLE bit of time to wrap your head around it before you deal with it, B) breast feedings benefits still amaze me!!!, C) knowing your body and performing self exams (or your significant other helping you out 😉) is still the biggest life saver for women.
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